There should be no boundaries on the tale end of one’s lifetime. Older people have seen, heard and done it all and their wisdom and life experience lends a lot to finding that one special person to spend the rest of one’s life with.
So what are some tips for those who are more inclined to cleverly quote Cary Grant than say, Carrie Bradshaw?
On line dating is simpler than ever. Although navigating a computer to get to the various sites out there may not be easy, the time and frustration in learning it is well worth it. Taking a basic computer course is a good thing and many resources for seniors offer a free course and access to a desktop to work with. Looking in to the local Y or senior center is a good start in asking, “How do I learn?” And in learning the “how?” it’s only a question of, “when.” Which segues to the next tip:
There are online predators who seek out those of any age demographic. ESPECIALLY seniors. So never reveal too much, too soon. Never give out a phone number and certainly never give out an address or pertinent safety and financial information. It’s easy to get caught up. Love makes us all giddy and silly and the heart speaks louder than the mind. Follow the mind in the beginning THEN follow the heart.
Be realistic about online dating.
Remember, online dating for seniors DOES differ from other online dating for say, a thirty-something. Seniors are more inclined to put up a real photo, rather than a doctored one. They can’t hide their age in their photos - why should they? A senior’s dating site is geared towards just the person they are in the picture – a senior. Lines and grey hair don’t hide themselves.
Also? Many online daters in the older demographic are single because they are divorced or widowed. Handling loss while meeting new daters is off-putting. What might have been an afterthought for so many years is now a reality and getting back out there is a lot more difficult than having been there in the first place. Therefore, it is imperative to think of oneself and be realistic about interests and what to do when meeting that person from the website for the first time.
Find a place that is comfortable and go there.
There are so many functions for seniors these days such as dances, walking tours, fishing, and arts and crafts. Go somewhere fun (and safe.) So often younger online daters will meet for coffee or a drink. Elderly daters know there are other places to go for a good time.
Bring a friend. Or two.
Just as any twenty-something woman has her “girls” in tow, bring yours along for a social event, too. It’s best to have shrewd friends who are honest about a possible prospect at the do-wop dance at the Sheraton. In fact, elderly online daters know they don’t have forty years to float around and to waste time. A good friend will always say, “Don’t wear that. It’s too matronly” while preparing for a night out just as he or she will tell you the man or woman sipping the whiskey sour clearly lied about their age.
One final tip?
Do not take anything too personally. Dating was never easy before grandkids were in the picture so why should it be any easier? Sometimes chemistry just isn’t there. And just as someone might have preferred a brunette to a blond back in the day, the same holds true now. Some people just are not meant to be.
Therefore, move forward and keep the positive attitude about it. The beauty of elderly online dating is that there is always someone else right around the corner whether it the local swimming pool or dating pool.